Alcohol's novelty has worn off for me; drinking to avoid boredom doesn't work. When I find myself outside of the party mood and bored, I get tired, antisocial and alienated, and just want to get the fuck out. I didn't say any goodbyes last night; I was in far too foul a mood to go through the motions. I noticed that when I'm upset and in a social situation, I keep a resolutely neutral expression, forcibly making my facial muscles relax. If I look irritated about something, I'm probably in a better mood than when showing nothing at all.
August 24th, 2002
Some people love floating from one person to another, making light conversation, or perhaps just watching people go about their merry business. I can't stand it - I like to get into heavy conversation, and most parties I go to just don't encourage that sort of thing. Last night was no exception. It was mostly a much younger crowd (I'd guess a median of about 22), and the conversations I heard there I'd heard or participated in far too many times previously.